That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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