i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
