my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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