i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize
