I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Your cock deserves a montage
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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