so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
