I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Help. Why am I so naked?
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