Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I pour the whiskey from now on
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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