So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
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For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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