sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize