I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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