I think I died a long time ago.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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