so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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