Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
