He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
