God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
