how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
