His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
