I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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