she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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