they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
