Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
