bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
oh god the rape fog is back!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize