do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
