Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
