she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize