Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just had sex on a roof
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
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