butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i think my tv is drunk
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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