dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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