at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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