She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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