Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize