she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
