Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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