Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
