went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Randomize
