so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
