had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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