We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
