why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
