Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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