We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize