Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
