youre lurking in front of me
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
