Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
All I want is dick and wine.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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