as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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