Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
