Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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