oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.â€
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