I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
That's how pantless uber rides happen
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
