I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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