I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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